I, like Oprah, know a few things for sure. One: when you're driving too fast, there probably is a police officer hiding around the next bend. Two: Roland and Terry once told me no clear alcohol, no white drugs. It hasn't been bad advice. Three: Wear sunscreen. The fourth thing I know for sure is that sometimes I get into really bad moods. Not like cute, frustrated, "bad day" bad moods, but really awful, negative moods where nothing seems to go right and nobody is above criticism. Today I took a test on governments in Europe and it was right about question 8 that I sank into the darkest of all dark moods--I think you could go so far as to say that I was in a downright black state of mind.

There is no solution, don't bother trying--I will undoubtedly lash out completely irrationally and say very cruel, although very perceptive, mean things that you'll probably remember for years to come because you were wounded so deeply. This is true, ask my sisters. I always regret it later, so the best thing I can do for the general public when I get this way is to either take a voluntary time-out and watch Glee for awhile, or, when that's not an option, just not talk to anyone except to say things like, "Get out of my way", and "Don't look at me."

Sidenote: I think most people can see that I'm not 100 percent because frankly I look like a serial killer. Once I saw my reflection when I was walking to class and feeling cranky and I frightened myself.

Generally I'm an enjoyable person, I tend to have a pretty positive outlook on life. I think I'm funny. I have a lot of good friends and when I eat alone it's by choice, not necessity. I do have cute "bad days", where I wake up late and spill coffee on my shirt and forget to print out an assignment and knock glitter all over my carpet--that was, for example, yesterday. That's easily laughed off and gotten over. Once I got a 200 dollar speeding ticket and still had a fantastic day at the beach, I've been to the Boot more than a few times sober and had fun, one day I went unprepared on an 11-mile hike and rubbed all the skin off my feet and called it a great time. I'm a trooper.

But sometimes for ten minutes, or for two hours, or a week, I'm a monster. It's fine, I embrace it. I love alone time--but that's a story for a different day.

xoxo, Lauren